A true Canadian girl!!!! Shambala5418: Tough girls come from New York, sweet girls come from Alabama, but Canadian girls have fire and ice in their blood. We can drive four wheelers, play hockey, be a princess, and throw left hooks. We can drink and hunt with the boys, and go home and cook like mom, and we have hearts of gold...We ....have an opinion, and you know that you're going...to hear it.  Shambala5418: CANADIANS IN HELL Two guys from Toronto die and wake up in hell. The next day the devil stops in to check on them and sees them dressed in parkas, mittens and toques warming themselves around the fire. The devil asks them, "What are you doing? Isn't it hot enough for you?" The two guys reply, "Well, you know, we're from Canada, the land of snow and ice and cold. We're just happy for a chance to warm up a little bit, eh." The devil decides that these two aren't miserable enough and turns up the heat. The next morning he stops in again and there they are, still dressed in parkas, toques and mittens. The devil asks them again, "It's awfully hot down here, can't you guys feel it?" Again the two guys reply, "Well, like we told ya yesterday, we're from Canada, the land of snow and ice and cold. We're just happy for a chance to warm up a little bit, eh." This gets the devil a little steamed up and he decides to fix these two guys. He cranks the heat up as high as it will go. The people are wailing and screaming everywhere. He stops by the room with the two guys from Canada and finds them in light jackets and bucket hats, grilling sausage and drinking beer. The devil is astonished, "Everyone down here is in abject misery, and you two seem to be enjoying yourselves." The two Canadians reply, "Well, ya know, we don't get too much warm weather up there in Toronto so we've just got to have a cook-out when the weather's THIS nice." The devil is absolutely furious, he can hardly see straight. Finally he comes up with the answer. The two guys love the heat because they have been cold all their lives. The devil decides to turn all the heat off in hell. The next morning, the temperature is below zero, icicles are hanging everywhere; people are shivering so bad that they are unable to do anything but wail, moan and gnash their teeth. The devil smiles and heads for the room with the two Canadians. He gets there and finds them back in their parkas, toques, and mittens. NOW they are jumping up and down, cheering, yelling and screaming like mad men!!! The devil is dumbfounded, "I don't understand, when I turn up the heat you're happy. Now it's freezing cold and you're still happy. What is wrong with you two???" The Torontonians look at the devil in surprise, "Well, don't you know? If Hell freezes over, it must mean the Leafs have won the Stanley Cup."  Shambala5418: Ok I have one more I want to share.....  An American decided to write a book about famous churches around the world. For his first chapter he decided to write about American churches. So he bought a plane ticket and took a trip to Orlando, thinking that he would work his way across the country from South to North. On his first day he was inside a church taking photographs when he noticed a golden telephone mounted on the wall with a sign that read $10,000 per call". The American, being intrigued, asked a priest who was strolling by what the telephone was used for. The priest replied that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 you could talk to God. The American thanked the priest and went along his way. Next stop was in Atlanta. There, at a very large cathedral, he saw the same golden telephone with the same sign under it. He wondered if this was the same kind of telephone he saw in Orlando and he asked a nearby nun what its purpose was. She told him that it was a direct line to heaven and that for $10,000 he could talk to God. "O.K., thank you," said the American. He then traveled to Indianapolis, Washington DC, Philadelphia, Boston, and New York. In every church he saw the same golden telephone with the same "$10,000 per call" sign under it. The American, upon leaving Vermont saw a sign for Canada and decided to see if Canadians had the same phone. He arrived in OTTAWA, and again, there was the same golden telephone, but this time the sign under it read "10 cents per call." The American was surprised so he asked the priest about the sign. "Father, I've traveled all over America and I've seen this same golden telephone in many churches. I'm told that it is a direct line to Heaven, but in every state the price was $10,000 per call. Why is it so cheap here?" The priest smiled and answered, "You're in Canada now son, it's a local call".  WAYTOBIG: Hahahahhaah very funny jokes indeed Canadian women are #1 in the world. They are rough,tough and beautiful Shambala5418: There was a boy who worked in the produce section of the market. A man came in and asked to buy half a head of lettuce. The boy told him that they only sold whole heads of lettuce, but the man replied that he did not need a whole head, but only a half head. The boy said he would go ask his manager about the matter. The boy walked into the back room and said, "there is some a*w&%$^ out there who wants to buy only a half a head of lettuce." As he was finishing saying this he turned around to find the man standing right behind him, so he added, "and this gentleman wants to buy the other half". The manager okayed the deal and the man went on his way. Later the manager called on the boy and said, "you almost got yourself in a lot of trouble earlier, but I must say I was impressed with the way you got yourself out of it. You think on your feet and we like that around here. Where are you from son?" The boy replied, "Canada. sir." "Oh really? Why did you leave Canada?" asked the manager. The boy replied, "They're all just whores and hockey players up there." "My wife is from Canada!!" said the manager. The boy replied, "Really? What team did she play for?" WAYTOBIG: LMFAO The kid sure does know how to jump into the fire pit with a full bucket of water. Thanks for the good laugh  Shambala5418: My job is to keep all you Canada lovers amused - ok it's not really my job but it is fun to post these little jokes.  lois_lane: Ok that first joke was a little painful LOLS. I agree with your first comment tho sham all the way   FrigginRiggin: Yes indeed Canadian women are a special breed. Down to earth, independent, put-you-in-your-place-take-no-shit kinda peeps. Sure they can don haute couture...but also change a tire....run a household...have a legit career and all with a child on their hip....figuratively speaking...the child is the man actually. They won't get mad at you when you wear socks to bed cuz its -40 Celsius outside. Generally speaking Can Girls can be a sophisticated queen in the streets and and absolute deviant in the sheets. shhh....i once saw a female I think she was from Regina...(rhymes with vagina....yes I know right!! any way I saw her with my own eyes roll her own tampon and kickstart a broomstick!....no word of a lie.....just kidding......i'm just joking ladies....put the wooden spoon down1.......MOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!  Solvento: Sooo... this is a bit off topic but do you all know why Canaans' father 'Ham' couldn't look upon his father naked (Noah)? | places Chat Room Similar Conversations |
Well said!! I totally agree! 
