Alan Edwin Innes (Alan Edwin Innes) Offline

123 Single Male from Dunfermline       109
         
I don't like Christmas

I will accept 100% of friend requests but if you're a bit of an arse I will unfriend. I will also not accept if I know you before hand and have a dislike or if there is something on your profile that repulses me.

decapitare.

For Mandalore!

What of the dawn!

You can't laugh and drink at the same time.

the value of words should be in how they hold their own weight.

whats new im listening,
feeling blue i'm listening,
feeling sad, feeling mad, feeling bad, feeling glad I'm listening,

I'm also known as Gandalf, number five, the bright lord, sauron, annatar, the lord of gifts, cornelius, Alan Edwin "The Cake" Innes Or just "cake".

there are only three things you may never insult a man over.

his hair,
his duvet,
and especially his hand towels.

I got a youtube. Its pretty Niffty:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCpfbccIvbX7h_vYi9yrWEZg

If you need me for some strange reason my discord is;
A mug of ale is always needed#0590

the historical figures i admire the most are
1:Martin Luther
2:Napoleon Bonaparte
3:Leonidas
4:Alexander the great
5:Hanibal
6:

The true ten commandments.

1:do not eat expired yogurt
2:remember to reset your watches dates at 12am
3:do not eat porridge
4:the most abysmal thing is when a goblin has the shortest ears in the room
5:rings are cool
6:excessive jewellery is not cool
7:science is the study of reality, as such anything that's "explanation" is not scientific is not in consideration
8:"well done" meat is just burnt food
9:Napoleon is the best at everything
10:you shall only drink sprite when at a movie theatre

I feel as though I have stared further and longer into space than Anyone has ever done before and what I saw was another scared panic filled animal looking back.

Alan Edwin Innes
Alan Edwin Innes: Not a lot this month. Been watching star trek next generation besides the stuff on this list. Also strange new worlds.

March:

{Movies}

Star ship troopers (1997) 5/10 I don't like the main characters, they all act like teenagers. The action scenes are basic and the cgi for the bugs is pretty good for the time but could stand to be better used. All of the scenes in the space craft with the shaky camera don't make any sense, its space there shouldn't be any shaking. Overall this movie is alright, but just alright. My favourite line was "Bugs don't take prisoners.".

John Wick (2014) 5/10 as far as pointless action movies go. Its alright. The violence is good but I would have much preferred it had more of a story and was maybe faster paced. Willem Dafoe is also there, but just kind of there. But it doesn't matter he's still the best part of every movie he's in including this one. My favourite line was "john wick is who you call to kill the fucking boogeyman.".

John Wick chapter 2 (2017) 6/10 So sometimes in video games, you go through a specific area so many times that you can remember every single placement of every single enemy and know exactly what weapon to use and can go through the whole thing without even thinking. Or you have so little health or weaponry that you have keep going through the level having to get everything down to perfection before you can complete it without dying. This is basically what this movie feels like. Just a really long one of them. This movie cares even less about its story than the last one, but its kind of better for it, more time for violence. My favourite line was "Two rules that cannot be broken, Jonathan. No blood on Continental grounds, and every marker must be honoured.".

John Wick Chapter 3-Parabellum (2019) 5/10 I like the Buster Keaton in the beginning. I also really like the sound effect of that giant guys jaw when he gets the book repeatedly bashed in. I also really like throwing knives. Despite being terrified of getting hit in the face by a horses kick seeing it happen to some goon is pretty cool. Especially multiple times. The scenes with him and Sofia just remind me of Indiana Jones and Marion Ravenwood from Raiders of the lost ark. Suppose not a bad thing though. This movie tries to have more story than the last one, but doesn't so its violence is even more meaningless really. My favourite line was "Guns and lots of guns.".

John Wick Chapter 4 (2023) 5/10 So at this rave all the party goers are both completely oblivious to the giant fat guy and John Wick beating the shit out of each other and also making plenty of room for their fight to happen at the same time. And also when the axes come out. And swords. And all of the other goons, seriously are these people blind or something. This feels most like a video game. More precisely at about the 85% completion point and he's just going through doing all the side quests. The ending even feels like an extended cut scene. These movies were a very long way to avenge a dog. But you know, dog so makes sense. My favourite line was "Consequences!".

The Shining (1980) 3/10 So uh, where is it scary? My favourite line was "How'd do you like some ice cream, Doc?".

Cannibal Holocaust (1980) X/10 This is only the second movie I haven't given a number rating for. It really can't be rated like that, it just kind of exists as it is. It is logical to say it is the single most controversial movie ever made. I didn't enjoy it, but I didn't not either. My lack of gore reaction probably made me able to look past a lot of stuff other people couldn't. This was, truly fascinating to watch. My favourite line was "I wonder who the real cannibals are.".

Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire (2024) 7.5/10 After the intense and complex story telling of John Wick I really needed some mindless violence. Pretty nifty violence, good location choices. Science that is only mostly... crap. A good addition the monsterverse. As strange as it is to describe the best way to describe this movie is "slow paced action". My favourite line was "Godzilla must be really pissed off.".
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DOOGYREV
DOOGYREV: What your dead to me, how dare you not love John Wick too slow paced!!? don't get me started 😭
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Alan Edwin Innes
Alan Edwin Innes in reply to DOOGYREV: It takes like twenty minutes before it properly starts. Has an action scene. Then another long break. Then just more action. Not much consistent pacing for the first movie.
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If the stars fell
If the stars fell: I approve
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Alan Edwin Innes
Alan Edwin Innes: Very good month this month, Lots of Star Trek. Next month will have the animated series and maybe Next generation depending on how fast I get through it.

February:

{Movies}

The Batman (2022) 4/10 So it starts with Ave Maria and it appears three more times in the movie. Not very subtle not noted. Honestly I found this movie pretty boring. Its cool visually though. I probably would have enjoyed it more if I was a batman fan. My favourite line was "Fear is a tool.".

Star Trek (2009) 9.3/10 I love every scene in this movie. It is visually spectacular, the music is eternally one upping itself, the time manipulation elements are more unique than first glance. This movie I have actually seen almost in its entiretry before, only I hadn't. I've seen bits of it across various years amounting to almost every scene. But this is the first time I watched it start to finish. This movie is partly why It took me so long to actually start to watch all Star Trek, because one of the scenes in this movie I had seen was of a god bleeding and I did not want that. While I don't have the fifty years of time between this and the original series the call backs to the original series were spectacular. My favourite line was "And yet you can be in two places at once.".

Star Trek into Darkness (2013) 9/10 Starts with another classic Star Trek adventure. Kirk and McCoy are almost dying, Spock is about to die. But they don't die. Not as visually spectacular as the first nor as well paced but it is once again extraordinary. Benedict does an excellent Khan and as does every other actor to their roles. The call backs to the original series are again well done. My favourite being the tribble. My favourite line was "The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few.".

Star Trek Beyond (2016) 7/10 The first half of this movie is pretty dull. It gets a lot better half way through however. The rescue of the crew feels kind of like a video game level/location honestly. Which isn't a bad thing I don't think. Overall this JJ trilogy was much enjoyable. Had many more aliens though than the Original Star Trek show. It was mostly just humans in the original with the occasional alien guest star. My favourite line was "Let's make some noise.".

The Wolf of Wall Street (2013) 8.5/10 For three hours long not a lot actually happens. However it doesn't feel like not a lot has happened which is pretty impressive film making. It also had a pretty high frame to scene efficency rate as movies go. Acting was also very well done. Also as the old rock and roll song goes "sex drugs and gasoline". My favourite line was "sell me this pen.".

Star Trek the motion picture (1979) 3/10 Besides McCoy in a beard, nothing really good in this movie. But there also isn't really anything wrong with it. It is just really, really slow. Also I don't like the new uniforms. My favourite line was "As much as you want the enterprise I want this.".

Star Trek II the wrath of Khan (1982) 7.8/10 The first half of this movie very much feels like, as Gandalf said "Its the deep breath before the plunge." And when it plunges man does it plunge. My only real complaint is that there wasn't enough Khan and that the budget should really have been, 20-40% higher. The story was clearly too big for the budget it had. But this was great. My favourite line was "Changed the conditions of the test. I got accommodation for original thinking. I don't like to lose.".

Star Trek III the search for Spock (1984) 6.5/10 Definitely a filler movie. Pretty enjoyable but I probably wont watch it again except during a re watch of everything. The way the Spock thing was handled was interesting though and significantly better than the majority of resurrection stories. Although didn't make that much sense really when thought about in real life. But in universe it makes sense. It was also strange have Doctor Emmet Brown as a murderous Klingon. My favourite line was "Fine I'll kill you later.".

Star Trek IV The Voyage Home (1986) 7.5/10 I was told this movie was really very bad going in. However I found it highly enjoyable. Perhaps the concept itself of whales some people found far to ridiculous. There's a scene of the Russian Chekov with the black woman Uhura asking a white cop in the eighties where nuclear missiles are stored. Now that's pretty funny. I really very much enjoyed on the television when the whales were being skinned and butchered. Its just very pleasant to watch you know. In many ways this movie reminds me of Escape from the Planet of the Apes one of my favourite apes movies. My favourite line was "No I'm from Iowa I only work in outer space.".

Star Trek V the final frontier (1989) 5/10 I did not know I needed to see Spock, McCoy and Kirk all singing around a camp fire before I saw it. Any instance of someone demanding proof from a God is always worth it. Not a lot really happens in this movie but its alright. My favourite line was "I couldn't help but notice your pain. It runs deep. Share it with me!.".

Star Trek VI The Undiscovered Country (1991) 6/10 This movie more than all the previous movies feels more like just an extended episode of the series than its own movie. There are more of Klingons in this movie than previous which I suppose makes sense given Klingons have appeared in I think all the previous movies but not very prominently. My favourite line was "If I were human. I believe my response would be... Go to Hell.".

{Television}

Star Trek the original series (1966) 7.5/10 If the entire show was as good as the first season It would probably have a 9/10. But as is, each season was worse than the last. Which is still pretty good but still. My main problem with season three is that a lot of the episodes just kind of end, no real resolution to the problem of the episode, quite lazy. However the first season was extraordinary. And so is Spock (to the absolute shock of no one Alan Edwin Innes likes Spock). The show also hasn't aged well, not just because of the low budget and also lack of political correctness (I don't really care about that though) but also in the stories it told, and the idea of a lot of the future technology. But given this is sixty years old, it is very impressive. The finale was also not very impressive, however it wasn't planned to be the finale. They also only really gave focus to either Sulu or Chekov in any given episode never both at once. The character of Uhura was also basically just forgotten about after season one. And season one also had a very common pattern of them beaming down to a planet, them beaming back up but with the monster of the week coming with them. Quite repetitive. My favourite line was "Beam me up Sc-" Hang on that line never actually appeared in the original Star Trek. My real favourite line was "The fact that my internal arrangement differs from yours, Doctor, pleases me no end.".
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Ken Bardu: The fun has begun
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Sliced Bread
Sliced Bread: When a cup of tea just doesn't cut the mustard.
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Alan Edwin Innes
Alan Edwin Innes: So I forgot to actually post this... Kind of shows how boring this months list is. Only two movies.

January:

{Movies}

The collector (1965) 8/10 Facinating. I've been wanting to watch this movie for about two years now and finally did. It has some of that ninteen sixties weirdness but is quite good. Well, good if you have a long attention span. My favourite line was "I wouldn't be a good prisoner if I didn't try to escape would I?".

reservoir dogs (1992) 2.5/10 It had some good scenes. But I have no idea what the plot is. Well I know what it is just not how it actually unfolded. My favorite line was "Now here are your names: Mr. Brown, Mr. White, Mr. Blond, Mr. Blue, Mr. Orange and Mr Pink."
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Alan Edwin Innes
Alan Edwin Innes: Behold Space!
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Sliced Bread
Sliced Bread: Yes, u can actually see the space between his ears.
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Alan Edwin Innes
Alan Edwin Innes: I got bored, I made a thing
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Sliced Bread
Sliced Bread: If u sync the bass drum and snare a little better to the round-houses and what not u'll have made a thing worthy of a cease and desist order, perhaps.
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Alan Edwin Innes
Alan Edwin Innes in reply to Sliced Bread: Well, its queen instrumentals with Nickelback hard cover instrumentals. I synced it to the best of ability. In order to synchronise perfectly, I would need to go essentially frame by frame, making probably thousands of minor changes, increasing speeds, or decreasing by one to ten percent. More trouble than its worth. Be faster to just redo the entire song from scratch.
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Sliced Bread
Sliced Bread: Gratuitous violence is priceless - Lord Glen.
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Alan Edwin Innes
Alan Edwin Innes: Last month of the year. For the next several months, the list is going to be dominated by Star Trek probably. Watched a lot of movies this month, was pretty good.

December:

{Movies}

Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (1984) 5/10 Man that broad is really annoying. Completely useless should have stuck with the one from the previous movie. Really the only sequence of this movie I enjoyed was the temple of doom itself and all the sacrificing and stuff, and the opening scene. The rest was very unimpressive. Also laws of physics defiant. My favorite line was "water! water! water!... water!".

Indiana Jones and the last Crusade (1989) 5.5/10 the Broad in this one is a big imporovement. The first third is excellent. However there are a lot of scenes like the chase and the finale which could have been a lot faster. Really slows down the pacing and is quite boring. If it was better paced this would have bee comparable to the first movie. My favorite line was "It belongs in a Museum!".

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the crystal skull (2008) 2/10 I uh... I beg your pardon. I geinunely don't know how to talk about this movie and explain why it is mental without spoiling the entire thing. And that ending I mean seriously what the hell?! So I'm just gonna leave it at that. My favourite line was "he Ugha word for gold translates as "treasure." But their treasure wasn't gold. It was knowledge. Knowledge was their treasure."

Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny (2022) 5.5/10 This has a pretty cool opening. I now want to punch someone after they open the car window. This movie has a couple hommages to the previous movies, but they don't feel like cheap fan service so much as acknoledgements of the staples of tomb crawling and archeological adventures. So it never feels like a re tred for more than a couple seconds at a time. The ending however is probably either a you love it or a hate it thing. But me being me I didn't really have either reaction. My favourite line was "Proving it is what makes it Science!"

Life of Pi (2012) 9/10 This movie has been stalking me for over eleven years now. I wanted to watch it when it first came out but didn't, then I pretty much constantly have seen posters, dvds, blu-rays everywhere. I even own a dvd and blu-ray but hadn't watched it till now. Jesus Allah Krishna this is a good movie. It is absolutely beautiful. Pi is smart but not unrealistically so, Richard Parker is great, oh man its good. As strange as it is to say, I would love to see a black and white version of this movie. My favorite line is, well I don't have one because there are so many good ones. But Since I have to chose, I will go with "So which story do you prefer?"

The Killer (2023) 7/10 Pretty cool. Michael Fassbender carries it which is fine given he's Michael Fassbender. My favorite line was "Of those who like to put their faith in the inherent goodness of mankind, I have to ask, "Based on what, exactly?"".

Rebel Moon (2023) 7.8/10 Man this is a pretty cool movie. I like the villain and his style, you can say what you want about fascists they know a good coat and cheekbones when they see it. The plot is, passable but I don't think thats really what this movie was going for. My favorite line was "You've chosen the side that doesn't even make it to the history books.".

Groundhog day (1993) 9.4/10 I mean its practically perfect. Especially the lack of explanation behind everything. I require no further review. My favorite line was "La fille que j’aimera Sera comme bon vin Qui se bonifiera Un peu chaque matin.".

Serenity Black and white edition (2005) 8/10 Despite the firefly black and white version being better than the standard colour edition this one was not as interesting. Might be something to do with the higher production value weirdly enough. Still, excellent watch. My favorite line was "Shepard used to tell me, if you can't do something smart. Do something right.".

{Television}

Firefly black and white edition (2002) 9/10 So after noodling around turning a bunch of random scenes black and white from this show, I just did the whole thing. It is somehow better than the original colour version. Makes a lot of the details in things more noticeable and space seem that much spacier. My favorite line was "You don’t know me, son, so let me explain this to you once: If I ever kill you, you’ll be awake. You’ll be facing me. And you’ll be armed.”.
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PirateRadio
PirateRadio: Warm socks and a hot cup of coco. These are exciting times.
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Alan Edwin Innes
Alan Edwin Innes: I know its a sin to mix star wars and star trek, but
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PirateRadio: It stopped raining here.
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PirateRadio: My neighbor bought a new sofa today.
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Alan Edwin Innes
Alan Edwin Innes: I watched all three hobbit movies in one day.

August:

{movies}

The kings man (2021) 8/10 It's a long way to Tipperary, its a long to go. Rasputin is... so very marvellous. His fight scene as well, some excellent choreography in it and music. Something easy to forget about history, is that all of these kings were actually very closely related, but this movie doesn't forget that. Trench coat, marvellous and historically accurate as it was invented during world war one for the standard French army uniform. It was also adopted for many other armies as such having a British officer wear one is excellent and of course, trench coats are excellent as is. The entire segment of the movie in the trenches in fact was marvellous, from the start right up to the end. This movie is absolutely full of excellent lines, practically one every scene. My favourite line was "As everybody knows. The tortoise eventually wins the race.".

The Matrix (1999) 7/10 There is an awful lot of leather clothing in this. Now I knew that going in but Jesus Christ there is a lot. Uncomfortable looking things. So some things in this are really cool from the computer angle. Like that shrimp thing being some code which functions like a tracker. It then gets removed which to us is this weird surgery. But to the reality is just the removal of code. Other things though are... why though? Its probably a symptom of the people at the time only recently having been exposed to computers. The concept itself is cool and all but, I mean the way it was implemented works fine if you don't think about it to much. Unfortunately I think about everything always so for me its not as well executed as it could have been. I think people say the dialogue in this is confusing just because its to damn quiet to be heard. Since I am watching this in, twenty twenty three this is probably a lot less impressive to me than had I been watching it when it came out or even just a decade ago. It does have fairly decent Cgi though, for the time. The entire movie is basically just world building which isn't a bad thing by any means but a better balance probably could have been made. Also since this is a movie which has been referenced thousands of times I kind of felt more like rewatching it than just watching it. Even though this was my first time seeing it. My favourite line was "you think my being stronger. Or faster has anything to do with my muscles in this place?"

Serenity (2005) 6/10 I would have much preferred another season of firefly over this. This feels kind of strange, a lot of plot lines that weren't finished concluded in firefly are just kind of stuck on here at the end. But for what it is, its pretty good. My favourite line was "we meddle.".

The Matrix Reloaded (2003) 5/10 So much leather clothing. Do people not sweat in this universe? Now its pretty cool when the agents were talking to each other, very quick, very blunt. Exactly how one would expect what are basically sentient anti virus programs to communicate. So during writing and filming no one thought that sermon scene went on for too long. Or was too... well too everything. Neo's and the Oracles conversation is interesting, if it was made today it would probably be about artificial intelligence. But I find this more interesting. I would like to know at which point in production was the script for that fight scene with agent Smith replaced for a fight scene from the journey to the west. The fight scenes in the movie as a whole while they do have impressive choreography lack one important thing, speed. Ironically this was done because they are moving too fast for us to understand what's going on so a lot is slowed down. But it makes it look too unreal. I would be interested to see sped up versions of the fights. My favourite line was "If we do not take time how will we ever have time?".

Spider-Man (2002) 7.5/10 While there were super hero movies and shows before this. This movie above all others really set the standard for Super hero movies especially for marvel. Hell describing the plot these days it sounds almost too standard but of course that makes sense given it set the standard. Willem Dafoe as the green goblin is of course the main highlight of this movie, great performance there aren't many similar villains out there at least that I know off. The other highlight, the man himself. J Jonah Jameson, I'd probably be like him if I ran a company. My favourite line was "Here's the real truth. There are eight million people in this city. And those teeming masses exist for the sole purpose of lifting the few exceptional people onto their shoulders. You, me? We're exceptional.".

Spider-Man 2 (2004) 7.5/10 This is more like a Peter Parker movie than a Spiderman movie. But it works well and had they done the original plan of four plus movies I think this movie would be even better given it would really build Peter Parker up as a character. Doctor Otto Octavius, another great villain performance and I want those arms. Now thats not what a fusion reaction would like at all in real life but its a pretty damn cool visual so its gets a pass. My favourite line was "The power of the Sun in the palm of my hand.".

Spider-Man 3 (2007) 9/10 This is my favourite Spiderman movie. No I'm not joking, or apologising for that. People have a lot of problems with Venom in this, This was my introduction to Venom as a character so I probably don't care as much as most people. Or maybe I don't care because we share the same weakness... sound. You can kind of tell that there were meant to be more movies made after this but fortunately not in too obvious a way. My favourite line was "I like being bad. It makes me happy.".

The Matrix Revolutions (2003) 3/10 I think that the Matrix movies would have been a lot better if they cut or speed up some scenes to make it just two movies. This third movie just feels kind of like a really long third act of the second movie. I would have much preferred it as just the first matrix and then a sequel. Trinity when talking to that French guy basically said "I'm on a speed run I can't be doing side quests!" marvellous. The whole battle was... It goes on for ages. The reason action scenes normally have cutaways during is so that your mind can basically enjoy each action scene as though it were solitary. But when you put them all together one after another it just gets kind of boring and repetitive. There are also a lot of moments in this movie where basically everything stops and your supposed to take in the imagery. But its always exactly the same imagery. A dark machine there, a yellow thing there. And just that is basically just it, only shown like fifty times. Really my biggest problem with this and really all three original movies is Agent Smith. I really like him but he doesn't get enough scenes and this effects the finale show down with him. It doesn't feel like its had really any build up, he's almost an after thought. If there were maybe just two scenes of Smith manipulating the Matrix before hand it would have seemed like a real build up since even if the Zion plot fails humanity will still survive in the Matrix right? Not in this case though and even though that was said early on, was never really shown. Thats another problem with these movies they are significantly more tell instead of show. My favourite line was "No it is a word. What matters is the connection the word implies.".

The lord of the rings the fellowship of the ring [Extended edition] (2001) 9.5/10 This is easily one of the best movies ever made. My favourite line was "So do all who live to see such times but that is not for them to decide. All we must do is decide what to do with the time that is given.".

The lord of the rings the two towers [Extended edition] (2002) 9.6/10 This is my favourite of the trilogy. My favourite line was "An Alliance once existed between Elves and Men. Long ago we fought and died together. We come to honour that allegiance"

The Lord of the rings the return of the King [Extended edition] (2003) 9.5/10 This might be "objectively" the best movie ever created. My favourite line was "The ring is mine.".

The Matrix resurrections (2021) 2/10 Well I suppose subtlety is no longer an option. Can't just ignore all the "philosophy" now, since thats all there seemingly is. I like the claytronics. Even though they don't call it claytronics. Really this was just really boring and seemed more interesting in recreating the previous scenes than making new scenes. My favourite line was "Nothing travels faster than light. Except gossip.".

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey [Extended edition] (2012) 8/10 Nori, Dori, Ori, Balin, Dwalin, Bifur, Bofur, Bombur, Fili, Kili, Oin, Gloin, Thorin. Now I'm not going to act like this movie and all three movies don't have some problem scenes, but I think that these are still a minority in comparison what is still excellent film making. My favourite line was "What do you mean? Do you mean to wish me a good morning or do you mean that it is a good morning whether I want it or not? Or perhaps you mean to say that you feel good on this particular morning. Or are you simply stating that this is a morning to be good on?".

The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug [extended edition] 8.5/10 This does feel basically like just a continuation of the first movie because originally there was only going to be two movies. But because of studio meddling we ended up with three. Its quite nice, to see all the spiders die. I hate spiders. Smaug also, utterly fantastic. My favourite line was "There is something about you. Something you carry, something made of gold... but far more precious.".

The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies [extended edition] 8.5/10 So this movie does cover only a few chapters from the book. But when one considers the amount of stuff that actually goes into a battle in the real world, it seems justifiable to me. Especially since we get a dwarf played by Billy Connolly. Nothing could be more perfect. My favourite line was "Yes, they will die. Today. tomorrow. one year hence, a hundred years from now. What does it matter? They are mortal.".

{television}

firefly (2002) 9/10 I like the dinosaur figures. My favourite line was “Someone ever tries to kill you, you try to kill ’em right back!”.
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PirateRadio
PirateRadio: My cats breath smells like cat food.
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Alan Edwin Innes
Alan Edwin Innes: Ok I finally watched the Wizard of Oz. Are you happy now people?

September:

Jurassic park (1993) 8/10 Saw it in 3d at the cinema, pretty cool. I don't have much exposure to 3d technology basically just this, doctor strange in the multiverse of madness and Jurassic world back when it came out. I expected the 3d to not work very well since it wasn't filmed in 3d, at least I don't think so. It actually worked extremely well though, especially during the Rexy chase scene and Clever girl scene. I basically have this movie memorized at this point as is, so I don't really know what else to say honestly. My favourite line was "You're implying that a group composed entirely of female animals will... breed?"

Iron man 2 (2010) 6.5/10 This is definitely a movie I keep on mostly for background noise. Its not as story focused or action focused as the first iron man, or really most super hero movies. Or just most movies for that matter. But I really like the characters, especially Justin Hammer great villain would have loved to see him as a recurring character. My favourite line was "I don't know if you know this, but I don't speak Russian!".

The Truman show (1998) 8.5/10 Very clever movie. Definitely worth at least three watches. Since everything is controlled both in the show but also in what the film makers show us it almost makes us part of the experiment. One of the most subtle lines but also ingenious was "the only way you and I ever made it through school was by cheating off each other's test papers." Now this is clever because since Marlon was an actor he would have been fed specific answers. As such Truman would have been cheating off his both correct and incorrect answers allowing the television show people to control his grade and therefore the story. All of the acting is excellent, especially when it gets bad when they are in reality plugging products. My favourite line was "You were real. That’s what made you so good to watch. There is no more truth out there than there is in the world I created for you. The same lies, the same deceit. But in my world, you have nothing to fear."

The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974) 2/10 ...I beg your pardon? I genuinely don't know what to write for this other, than it was incredibly dull. My favourite line "*muffled scream*" (Screaming was about ninety percent of the dialogue).

Iron man 3 (2012) 7.5/10 People don't like this movie. I don't really get why I really like the Mandarian twist. Really my only complaint is that it is paced very quickly then it slows down by a real lot. But its not to big a problem. My favourite line was "Sweetheart, that could be the name of my autobiography.".

The Wizard Of Oz (1939) 6/10 Apparently seeing this movie is part of the requirements to be human. I didn't qualify before so I am being forced, by everyone here on wire to watch it. I knew going in there would be some references I didn't know were from this. The ones I spotted were "ding dong the witch is dead, I'd turn back if I were you, Ow we oo, we oo. Overall this movie was... fine, I guess. "How can you talk if you haven't got a brain?".
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tstarr8481
tstarr8481: I'm thrilled....xoxo....
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snidge
snidge: Toto, I've a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore.
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PirateRadio
PirateRadio: I like cheddar cheese and parmesan.
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Alan Edwin Innes
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Alan Edwin Innes
Alan Edwin Innes: Interesting month this month. Next month should have the rest of Indiana Jones.

{Movies}

Napoleon (2023) 9.5/10 Already in the first scene of the movie and I am all for this. Seeing the historical nod of the wooden wheel cart is exceptional. People say every frame is a painting, This movie, it isn't just absolutely beautiful to look at. It looks like genuine efforts with the camera work and the editing was taken to make it look like an actual live action painting.

There were lots of minor historical nods thrown in as well, Such as the sphinx already having lost its nose when Napoleon is in Egypt (There is a common myth that Napoleon ordered the nose be destroyed. This isn't true) I would need to watch it many times over to catch them all.

My only real, complaint with this movie, is that it is to short. In order to cover all of Napoleons life both personal and career it would have had to have been probably a ten hour movie. Which is understandable as to why it was made to just be two hours and a half. Problem with this is that it doesn't give a lot of time for important characters like Tsar Alexander. Had they had fewer scenes devoted to Josephine and more to war I think it would have been better. Now, since I am a giant Napoleon nerd, that isn't to much of a problem for me since I already know everything. But, for someone who don't know nothing, this would probably be a very disappointing movie. My favorite line was "Accept the peace offer or bare the consequences of a man bent on peace by any means"

Indiana Jones Raiders of the lost ark (1981) 7.5/10 Quite strange watching this in twenty twenty three. The sound effects, production value and well, the Indiana Jonesiness of it all makes it feel more like a parody of Indiana Jones only, this is Indiana Jones. That also is probably due to the amount of references it gets elsewhere, stuff like the boulder is so well known that even people who have never seen this movie will recognise it. I found the movie overall to be just alright but can absolutely see why it is such a pop culture landmark. My favorites line was "Not a very private place for a murder.".

{Television}

Young Sheldon (2017) 4/10 If you're a fan of the Sheldon character you'd probably like this. If not, you're bogged. My favorite line was "lollipop lollipop oh lolli lollipop.".

Ahsoka (2023) 8.8/10 Incredible. It feels like the original trilogy in the world of the prequels with sequel era production value. Perfection when it comes to star wars. Oh and that ending, yes please. Also when the spoiler character appeared and did the thing with the thing, oh yeah, thats some good star wars there. My favourite line was "Thrawn! Thrawn! Thrawn! Thrawn! Thrawn!".

The Boys (2019) 8.5/10 Mmm, thats nice blood. I actually keep this show in my rotation now. This has a lot of things I like, gore, violence, creative murder, murderous maniacs... other. But most of all it has what other shows are missing these days, Just a good old fashioned slobber knocker. And theres some real good ones in this. My favourite line was "Sometimes it's hard being superior to every single other person on the Planet. It's isolating. And Gods should not have to feel that kind of pain because that is what we are. You and Me. We're Gods."

Gen V (2023) 6/10 I'll have you know toe socks are not weird. This is a lot less consistent that The Boys. Also the ending was quite bizarre. The characters are kind of dull. It was still enjoyable though. This also brings the count of Supernatural actors in The Boys to three. My favorite line was "Alright. Now, can you make it contagious?"
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Alan Edwin Innes
Alan Edwin Innes: Well Windows Ten. You've served me well for the past eight years. But I'm afraid, the time has come. For windows eleven to take the figurative wheel.
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Alan Edwin Innes
Alan Edwin Innes: I normally post these at mid night, but I was asleep. So I'm posting it now. This marks the one year since I started reviewing movies and it's a pretty empty list this month.

October:

Doctor strange in the Multiverse of Madness (2022) 8/10 I really like this movie. It is paced a bit strangely but really it gets a bad wrap. Some excellent visual effects and, decent story even got a Minotaur. My favourite line was "This time its going to take more than killing me to kill me."


{Television}

The Big Bang Theory (2007) 4/10 After finding out that I am basically Sheldon I had an obligation to watch this. And I found it... Meh. My favourite line was "Oh gravity thou art a heartless bitch.".
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Alan Edwin Innes
Alan Edwin Innes in reply to tstarr8481: Thats another Sheldon thing. I don't dance
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codePoet0XA
codePoet0XA: "Oh gravity thou art a heartless bitch.".... cross referencea song...because that's the way my brain works.... "but gravitiy always wins"- Fake Plastic Trees/Radiohead
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tstarr8481
tstarr8481 in reply to Alan Edwin Innes: Shocker....
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Alan Edwin Innes
Alan Edwin Innes: This is where the fun begins.
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DOOGYREV
DOOGYREV: my favourite scene from Alien Vs Predator is when whatever her name was gets a lesson from Yanja Gregory in the use of the skull for a shield to protect against the acid blood.
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DOOGYREV
DOOGYREV: I actually look forward to reading your Alien reviews and lines
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DOOGYREV
DOOGYREV: favourite
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Alan Edwin Innes
Alan Edwin Innes: So I thought this was common knowledge, but apparently it isn't. The species name of the Predators in the predator movies is "Yautja". I'll be using that word a lot.

July:

{movies}

One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest (1975) 3/10 There wasn't much of a plot to this, I really much prefer plot driven stories. All of the yelling in this really got to me. Not in a good way. It also doesn't help that I don't like any of the characters. My favourite line was "Mmm, yummy.".

Predator (1988) 5/10 This is a movie with really great scenes, but very little plot or really motivation. The yautja design is very cool and I really like that Arnold schwarzenegger is not an idiot in it. My favourite line was "Knock knock.".

Predator 2 (1990) 4/10 Not as bad as I were expecting honestly. The plot isn't very important or very... well there. But that was a pretty cool ending and I was genuinely surprised at the reveal. I especially like the way it played out. It was also neat getting to see a lot more of the yautja design. My favourite line was "Don't worry asshole. You'll get another chance.".

Predators (2010) 4/10 I mean I suppose its an accurate title. The Yautja in this are a whole lot dumber than in previous movies which is a shame. I do like the more varied designs between them though. The thing that made the Yatija deadly while it was in part because of their technology it was mostly because they had a mind adept to hunting. These guys are just brutes really. Much like alien three this movie also has a discount Samuel L Jackson which is a plus. But overall this movie is unimpressive. My favourite line is "we are predators too".

The Predator (2018) The Predator (2018) 8/10 So in predator two, a naked broad survived an encounter with the Yatija. And in this, another naked broad survives an encounter with the yautja, coincidence!... Probably. The thumbs up scene actually made me laugh. Which to get me to actually physically laugh, its quite a feet. Also, don't starve, love that game. Being dead in it is also quite accurate. The yautja in this are thankfully back to being smart which is marvelous. There's also some guy who looks suspiciously like Dean Winchester. There's also finally, blood glorious blood. I mean the other movies had blood but this had glorious blood. Murder suicide scene, very well done, like that. Also the Predator the big one. Man, the yautja in these movies have always looked absolutely delicious, this guy looked like pure anger. He was very, very edurate. Just unrelenting and that was great. My favourite line was "well we took a vote predators cooler."

The Martian (2015) 8/10 This is a great movie. If I were on mars in the same situation as him I would probably survive quite well but then one day forget to put my helmet on. You know something stupid like that kills me. I don't have much to say about the movie itself, every single scene in it is good, it scratches many of figurative nerd itches. Also Jesus christ, Plants are. Scarily big... My favourite line was "If we're gonna call something project elrond then I would like me codename to be Glorfindel.".

Prey (2022) 8/10 Its cool to see a yautja hunt non humans. It is annoying how the animal predators are overly aggressive, thats not really how animals other than particularly evil swans (also known as all swans) and chimpanzees work. The first time we see the yautja its pretty cool. I like the design of the helmet. However this new design does make this yautja the least delicious looking of all the yautja but it still looks tasty. The mouth flap teeth thingies are looking at their best in this movie. This movie also finally had some really cool fight choreography. All the previous movies had cool action scenes but this one was the first one to have some genuine choreography. It being set in the past also works well, not just the different physical design but the different equipment and in subtle ways it hunts really shows the progression of the Yautja over the centuries. My favourite line was "You can't see but I'm killing you.".

Alien vs predator (2004) 6.5/10 So this is non cannon which I much prefer than it being cannon. It feels kind of like a mix of Indiana Jones, ancient aliens, alien and predator. An interesting mix and it makes some sense but it could have been executed better. There was very little consistency in the sounds volume, very loud action scenes and very quiet dialogue (seriously stop doing this movie people). I really hate ancient aliens in real life, in movies I don't tend to mind but this movie it was quite... thats not language works. I think the Xenomorphs and Yautja in this movie actually influenced future versions of them more than the cannon movies, which is interesting. The Yatja are more brutish (Like in Predators) and use them throwing blades thingies (Like in the Predator) and the Xenomorphs much more animalistic and less intelligent than in previous movies (Like in alien covenant (although I think thats actually a lore reason)). The first half of this movie was pretty unimpressive but not bad, however the second half was quite enjoyable. I wish there was more of... whatever her name is interacting with the Yautja that I'm going to call Gregory. Those interactions were very enjoyable. My favourite line was "actually its doctor and your welcome.".

Alien vs Predator requiem (2007) 3/10 I might have been watching the directors cut, so everything I say might not apply to the ordinary movie. So if the first one was Indiana jones/ancient aliens/predator/alien. Then this one is Teenage drama/alien/Predator. A significantly worse pairing. It has a decent opening. The Predalien design is also pretty nifty although barely shown so to actually admire it one must google image search it. Its also good that we see a much more skilled Yautja this time who I elect we call George. The action scenes are pretty decent if a bit short. However literally every other scene which isn't an action scene is awful. Overall I don't think this movie is as bad as people say but it was quite terrible. My favourite line was "wait a minute, we're going to be covered in shit?"
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Alan Edwin Innes
Alan Edwin Innes: This month I watched the alien franchise and one other movie. Next month Will be predators and then alien vs predators.

June:

Alien (1979) 5/10 Disappointed honestly. I heard a lot of these movie and weirdly enough know a lot of the lore to alien and the expanded universe of it. But this movie was, not scary, nor was it super compelling. Really the Xenomorph at times seemed a bit goofy. The chest bursting scene was barely gore but for some reason everyone acts like its the most brutal thing on film. Overall not worth a re watch. My favourite line was "You have my sympathies"

Aliens (1986) 5/10 I found this quite boring. It didn't seem like an action movie or a horror movie. It just felt like a bunch of very quite scenes with the occasional very loud scene which had a lot of blood. I dislike all the marines, they are all assholes. The face huggers were also unnaturally strong, the new Xenomorph design was cool and I did like seeing them in better lighting. I did like that they kept humans alive so that they could then face hug them, Xenomorphs are smart. I also really like the whole, termite queen theme they went with on the Xenomorph queen, however it did look a bit... I think those eggs would fall through and break that clearly fabic egg tunnel. Also you realise the vacuum of space is... the vacuum of literally infinite. Your arms are not infinitely strong. My favourite line was "game over man, game over"

The Shawshank redemption (1994) 8.5/10 My favourite part of this movie is that Andy is the main character, but really its morgan freeman (I'm sure he has a character name but its Morgan freeman) who is our point of perceptive. The plot is nothing special but its execution is extraordinary. Also, the poster in the end depicts the female from one million years bc, Even if its just a human character from a dinosaur movie, This dinosaur connection makes it better. My favourite line was... "I have no idea to this day what those two Italian ladies were singing about. Truth is, I don’t want to know. Some things are better left unsaid. I’d like to think they were singing about something so beautiful, it can’t expressed in words."

Alien 3 (1992) 5.5/10 This has been my favourite Alien movie so far. It's got interesting characters, a Xenomorph that is actually somewhat intimidating although admitidly has some bad Cgi. Even an emergency Samuel L Jackson. My favourite line was "You're all gonna die. The only question is how you check out. Do you want it on your feet? Or on your fuckin' knees... begging? I ain't much for begging! Nobody ever gave me nothing! So I say Fucking that thing! Let's fight it!".

Alien resurrection (1997) 3/10 The sound balancing is really bad in this, Absolutely quiet dialogue and mind bogglingly loud everything else, tis painful to get through. The cinematography is also crap in a lot of places, like the scene where the Xenomorph kills the other one, absolutely rubbish. That's not how genetic engineering or cloning works, that's not how guns under water works, No really, that's seriously not how genetic engineering OR genetic reproduction works, that's also not how the vacuum of space works, That's also not how impact creators work. The one part of this that was very good was showing of the Xenomorphs intelligence even more so than the previous movies. My favourite line was "I'm a stranger here myself."

Prometheus (2012) 6.8/10 The scene with David with all the volume-metric displays was mesmerising, He reacts exactly the same way I would. These reviews are mostly arbitrary there's no science to them but a good four points of this movies score is just for that scene. The way all the planets chain together like both constellations and chemical formulas, perfectly matching the idea of biological engineering by advanced space society. The way they over lay with each and interact, the still moving Engineers just interacting with their technology. David looking around eventually finding earth, its all so... exactly perfect. This movie does have problems, its very slow in the first half. The C-Section scene also went for grossness rather than gore which I am not a fan off grossness in general, much prefer blood. Also, naturally there was a giant step up in the CGI, now this stuff actually looks real, not perfect but still good. My favourite line was "Just something from a film I like.".

Alien covenant (2017) 5.8/10 Already in the first scene and I'm into it. The set design here is extraordinary, its all so very... sterile. I could go on but don't want this to go on for too long. Like Prometheus this is very slow at the start. Even though there are the Neomorph's The real start of this movie is at the scene with the flute. It's expertly done and is a long take which is exceptionally more impressive. The aliens in this, so both the Neomorph and Xenomorph are way more aggressive than previous Xenomorphs. Which is cool since it shows of their progression, with the smartest Xenomorphs being in resurrection. I don't have much to say on this movie honestly, all of the scenes without David feel like a "standard" alien movie. Mysterious planet, stupid human getting infected, embryo bursting, synthetic stuff, then the alien gets spaced. But all the scenes with David, were excellent. My favourite line was "shhhh, Don't let the bed bugs bite."
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Ken Bardu
Ken Bardu: Long live David đŸ’Ș
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Dethic__
Dethic__: Prometheus black goo lol
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