Shaking...

My hands have been shaking all day today. I don't know what's wrong, but I'm actually a little alarmed. They've been shaking about half an inch in any direction. Staring at my fingers is really creeping me out.

4 Days...

This song has been stuck in my head 4 days. Yesterday I was cool with it.. but this morning when I was brushing my teeth and it popped up again, 'twas the last straw. Misery loves company. Enjoy.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=GyA8zfouG4Y
www.vimeo.com/2849494?pg=transcoded_embed&sec=2849494

From your not so friendly virus,

~ BlackCaesar

Caesar, Where Have You Been? And When You Come Home You Gotta Sit All Alone

The past few weeks have been pretty nasty. I apologize to all of you who have my number or M** and didn't really answer back or call or whatever. I see you MacMetal.. leave me alone, I'm trying my best. (True story, I haven't logged on to M** in... I want to say at least two months.)

The good news: I got an internship at Universal Music Group Canada, I'm currently in the marketing department for one of their subsidary labels. My portfolio is about to grow a few a pant sizes.

The bad news: It's unpaid.

The ugly news: I'm broke. I still need to manage some classes around working. And I'm tired. REALLY TIRED. Too tired to go to the gym some days... just waking up at 5am and then rolling over and then of course oversleeping. Too tired to want to hang out, too tired to want to talk, just mentally fatigued. I've also been surgically attached to my computer. Ironically enough, I haven't actually been contacting anyone. It's like having a cellphone attached to your ear but having it off most of the time.

There's sun over the horizon though, it looks like I may be getting the job after the internship period is over. Hooray.

So as I blindly chase dead prime ministers and a queens printed on multicoloured sheets of paper, bear with me. I'll be around when I'll be around.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go prepare a presentation for a class in about an hour.

~ BlackCaesar

LID (Foamborn) Sighting

LID gets his ass handed to him. This explains the images of him with head cut open and lying on a hospital table. Surgery is serious business. Get well soon, LID.

Bitter.

((I kind of wished I wrote this yesterday when the feeling was still fresh in my mind, but I was tired and went to bed.))

A simple hug and goodbye is all I muttered as I left my friend behind. What was awaken in me were too many memories. Memories, not necessarily bad ones, but ones long since forgotten.

I make my way through the crowd,
Rubbing clothes, arms and skin.
A sardine's a sardine tin,
That's what I'm in.

I make my way to the front door only to be met with more delays, more waiting, more lines, more required patience. I really just want to leave.

Just let me go,
This tin isn't for me,
This space is too small,
This isn't where I want to be.

The coat check. "484, please," I wait and see another old face, frozen in time, as if nothing has changed. My mind sinks into my heart and they're buried deep. "Here's your coat, have a nice night."

My face now cold as ice,
Unforgiving and concrete,
Eyes unmoving like stone,
Harsh and like sleet.

Past the men in black guarding the door, "Have a good night," "Thanks," is all that can escape my lips, as I venture forth into a mist. A mist of smoke and chained sardines, chained to this place, for they want to return to their tin. However, I desperately escape.

Finally, I'm free,
Enough of this nonsense,
I can breathe again,
Survived with no recompense.

My hair freezes instantly, still wet from the shower I took before I left my abode. The relief I was feeling only moments ago quickly fades. My headache, which decided to come with me when I left the house retakes it's place as an untalented extra on the stage which is my mind. I make my way to a lonely bus stop and start to question my feelings.

Why do I feel such hate?
Why do I feel such disdain?
Why do I feel such suffering?
Why do I feel such pain?

And then it hits me with a force that could shake the earth, it's not that I hate these people or that I hate this place. It's that I feel like nothing has changed when I'm here. It felt like I was stuck in a swamp, waist deep in mud, staring at the sky, watching birds. All I wanted to do was fly. It felt like the progress and the effort I had once put out was for nothing, was lost, I couldn't take it.

With this epiphany I am only rewarded by a stiff cold breeze that slaps my cheek. Is this what a normal person enjoys? Going to a bar, a tavern, a pub, drinking until they can't see straight, inhaling smoke with little recollection of the night before, seeing the same people, doing the same things, week after week, month after month, year after year? This sickening repetition, that seems to blanket their lives? Is this fun?

I'd rather sit with friends, listening to good music, over a cup of tea or lay back and stare at the ceiling talking about nothing of importance, but of every importance or even go to a house party and make a fool of myself, dancing and singing off key to the songs that make us laugh. That's fun.

I haven't felt this way in a long time. Boredom. True boredom. It was as if I was choking, as if I was sinking in tar. I felt colder than a Montréal March wind, more painful than hail cutting open sensitive skin, more deceitful than the black ice that covers the streets tonight, much darker than the endless sea of black above. More, much more.

Bitter.

2:15am

It's 2:15am in the morning. I'm listening to Muse, Janelle Monae, Malajube, Amanda Diva, Kool G Rap and Talib Kweli. Is something wrong with me? Tell me, I can take it. Just don't get mad if I retaliate my popping you on the chin.

Slow day.

I tried cutting some non-braided hair on the back of my head with a box cutter I found on my desk. My hair was stronger. Now announcing the Welter Weight Champion of the world... coming from the region known as SCALP! Hair...

Checkpoint 2!

Level 7. Someone start the Rocky montage music. Left hook, jab, jab, uppercut.

Round 3... FIGHT!

Adorable

BlackCaesar: I cry openly to chick flicks and cute lil' animals make my heart tremble.
ILustYou: That's adorable.
BlackCaesar: I also eat babies.
ILustYou: That's not adorable.

I'm coming clean.

Due to the outcome of recent events, I decided I should come clean. I too am not who I seem to be.

My real name is Jeffrey "Jekyll Jam Jamal" Jenkins. I'm really a cyborg from the future here to foresee the events of this small pocket of time on this communal you call Wire Club. I'll be using examples from these events to write my ninth grade history term paper on general stupidity, nonsense and fallacies.

I have already gotten a full grade on my paper, however, I became somewhat enamored with the current situation, so I decided to stay in the past and watch the events unfold. I'm sorry I didn't tell you all earlier and deceived you, but I needed to pass my paper. I'm just being a good student.

If you have any questions, please ask them in this blog. I have all the time in the world.

PS. c wut i deed dare? That was a pun. My friends call me Pun Dog.

PPS. The INTERNET IS SERIOUS BUSINESS!