 Friends  | mrmars: You still alive lol 8 years ago • Report • Link 0  phar_koff: Son said to Dad “I`m Gay.” Dad looks at his other son and said “What about you?” Other son said “Me too Dad.” Dad said “doesn`t anyone in this family like pussy?” The Daughter said “I do…” phar_koff: Creative = insane Young at heart = juvenile Financially secure = under administration Loves walks on the Beach = can't swim Must like pets = infested with lice Prefer not to say = can't spell dope Close to family = enjoys incest Loves children = pedophile Attractive = short sighted Quiet nights at home = TV is broken Candlelit dinner - power is cut off Surprise me = no imagination The usual things = terrified of anything new Looks for the best in people = simple minded Get to know each other = you can buy me things Cence of humor - watches re-runs of Seinfeld Intellegint = Dumb Have no baggage = the memory of a goldfish Easy going = often drunk Down to Earth = no legs Enjoys long drives = homeless No players = naive Not into one night stands = frigid Don't care what you earn = is interested in your assets Ready to settle down = never had a relationship longer than 2 weeks And have children together = the syphilis is cured Bubbly = tends to regurgitate Prefer to be out and about = I am a speed freak Good cook = has own can opener It's what's inside that counts = has nasty skin condition... phar_koff: Japanese scientists have now created a camera with such an immense shutter speed that it is now possible to take a photograph of a woman with her mouth closed......... phar_koff: Potato Soup Posted: 10/22/2007 8:56:05 AM 1 quart chicken stock 5 sprigs thyme Salt and freshly ground black pepper 2 pounds baking potatoes, like russets 1/2 pound yellow onions (I like leeks instead) 1 cup whipping cream 1 baked potato 12 ounces Cheddar, shredded 4 tablespoons sour cream, for garnish 4 tablespoons scallions, for garnish 4 tablespoons bacon, cooked and crumbled, for garnish Preheat oven to 400 degrees Fahrenheit. In a heavy 1 1/2-gallon stock pot, heat the chicken stock. Add thyme, salt, and pepper. In a food processor, puree raw potatoes and onions. Add to stock. Simmer slowly for 1 1/2 to 2 hours. Add whipping cream and diced baked potatoes. (If soup becomes too thick, thin with water). To serve, ladle 8 ounces of hot soup into an oven proof serving bowl or slow cooker. Top with 2 to 3 ounces of shredded cheddar cheese. Place under the broiler for 4 to 6 minutes or until cheese is melted. Place on plate. Top with 1 tablespoon sour cream, 1 tablespoon diced scallions, and 1-tablespoon bacon, and serve. phar_koff: 1 pckge philly cream cheese...(i think they are 8 oz) 1 cup white sugar 1 tsp real vanilla extract 1 tbsp lemon juice beat all these together in a large bowl until cream cheese is kinda fluffy and the sugar is incorporated...take 1 large container of cool-whip (thawed) and fold it together with the cream cheese mixture...add as many blueberries as you like saving a few handfuls to sprinkle on top...once you have everything mixed thoroughly...place into a cooled graham cracker crust and refrigerate for a few hours... (i wont give a recipe for graham cracker crust cuz its so easy but when you line the pans with it for baking...dont compress it too much or it will be very hard)... i find that this will yield 2 -9x9 pans... its simple andeasy to make but very very good  phar_koff: haven't a clue , not my recipe , i'm just cutting and pasteing , maybe google it , think it's a yankie term.... phar_koff:
Tuscany Tomato Soup 1/2 cup olive oil 1 red onion, diced 5 cups chicken broth 2 cups fresh basil leaves, chopped 4 cans (28 oz.) tomatoes, chopped 10 slices 2-3 day old bread, cubed Heat oil in large Dutch oven; sauté onions until soft; add tomatoes, broth and bread; reduce heat and simmer 20-25 minutes, stirring occasionally to break down bread; add basil and cook 5-10 minutes. Note: Can use more of less bread depending on how thick you like your soup. phar_koff: A few days after Christmas, a mother was working in the kitchen listening to her young son playing with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train stop and her son said, "All of you sons of bitches who want off, get the hell off now, cause this is the last stop! And all of you sons of bitches who are getting on, get your asses in the train, cause we're going down the tracks." The mother went nuts and told her son, "We don't use that kind of language in this house. Now I want you to go to your room and you are to stay there for TWO HOURS. When you come out, you may play with your train, but I want you to use nice language." Two hours later, the son comes out of the bedroom and resumes playing with his train. Soon the train stopped and the mother heard her son say, "All passengers who are disembarking from the train, please remember to take all of your belongings with you. We thank you for riding with us today and hope your trip was a pleasant one. We hope you will ride with us again soon." She hears the little boy continue, "For those of you just boarding, we ask you to stow all of your hand luggage under your seat. Remember, there is no smoking on the train. We hope you will have a pleasant and relaxing journey with us today." As the mother began to smile, the child added, "For those of you who are pissed off about the TWO HOUR delay, please see the bitch in the kitchen." |
