RadIntentions Offline

36 Male from Aa Junction       251

Carl the badass dragon. (Written slightly less than sober)

Carl was the most beautiful blue dragon ever. His name was given to him by his mom for the noises he made when he was a hatchling.

They were a feathery maned type of dragon know as sky lions, because they looked like a pack of blue lions flying around from underneath. Of course they didn't like being referred to as such slow dull fanged creatures. But Carl didn't mind, he thought lions were kinda cute. Though he didn't like the way they killed all those animals so slowly. He thought they should be more like him, and kill them quickly from behind with one clean peck to the neck.

Unlike most other Sky Lions, Carl didn't fly with the pack, he enjoyed the freedom of being alone, and go where ever the wind may take him. Also, Carl was a badass, and knew he didn't need any of his friends to fuck shit up.

One day Carl was flying into what some would consider human territory. If such stupid, slow, fumbly creatures could consider the land they live on theirs. And Carl smelled a particularly tastey smelling one.

So he decided he'd swoop down and eat it, then right before he snatched go the human he noticed, it wasn't him but the large bucket in front of him that smelled good. So instead of eating the human, Carl simply stuck his head inside the bucket eating all the food.

The silly human kept making ever sillier noises, and flailing his arms like one of his tree swinging cousins. At first Carl thought about eating him to make the noise stop, but decided the food was pretty good. Infact it was so good that Carl decided to fertilize their ground for them.

Most people don't know this, but the most magic part of a well fed dragon is their poop. So sharing such a thing is a great sign of respect.

Carl flew high and magestically spreading his bountiful fertilizer across the silly humans land. Feeling the kindness in his heart he flew back home, with a full belly, and a filled heart.