I thought they smelled bad on the outside.
Cleric: "So, how can we be sure that it's orcs rampaging through the countryside?"
Me: (whose village was destroyed by said orcs): "Oh, we don't. For all we know, they could just be enthusiastic cosplayers who got lost."
Cleric: "OK, what do we know about them?"
Me: "They're angry. They're reckless. They stink."
Cleric: "Stink? Don't all orcs stink?"
Fighter: (who is half-orc) "You makin frenz like nobodies business today."
I don't understand anti-vaxxers.
I don't understand flat Earthers.
I don't understand young Earth creationists.
I don't understand climate change deniers.
I don't understand quitlings or Tory voters.
I mean, I understand confirmation bias, cognitive dissonance, and that some people are just as thick as a shit sandwich made from two short planks, but surely there can't be that many of them out there?
Geoff: I posted that limerick about the origins of the word, "Tory," onto Facebook and got a like from my old English teacher.
He was one of those teachers who made you really care about the subject.
That brought a smile to my face.
Geoff: During this election campaign, Boris Johnson’s mask has slipped so far it’s currently dangling round his ankles. This time, he’s reacted to a journalist showing him a picture of a sick child... by taking their phone and putting it into his pocket, instead of looking at it.
When ITV News’s Joe Pike repeatedly entreated the Prime Minister to look at and react to the photo of a four-year-old boy with suspected pneumonia forced to lie on coats on a hospital floor due to lack of beds – a story that made the Mirror’s front page – Johnson refused to engage.
Geoff: Have you ever thought, with all this naughty and nice bullshit, Santa is the most judgemental arsehole on the face of the Earth?
Geoff: OK, so Boris Johnson is actually under investigation in the USA for his sketchy links to Russia, but he's allowed to sit on the Intelligence and Security Committee's report into Russian influence in British politics?
What the shit?
And people still want to vote for this bastard?
Geoff: What in the actual fuck?