Section 3

after 3 days of trying ot get in i finally did. it was weird being inside of a new place i never thought id ever see. the biggest change was the fact that i had to share a room with 40 other guys. the women stayed downstairs. there were rules like any other place. chores and other things u had to do. after a while i had to work for my bed because i needed at least one payed temp job to stay a little longer. days turned into weeks as i continued to walk everyday about 5-8 miles per day for about a month when it finally happened. i got a job!!!

I found God while i was in the shelter. I prayed hard and studied as well as talking with the others that were liked minded. i prayed for his guidance and continued to let him lead me and my life. i have been changing the habits that i viewed as bad in God's teaching and turned them into good habits in other ways. I love God and continue to ask for his guidance as well as praising him for the opportunities and the days im still breathing.

fast food job but a job none the less.that bought me some more time to get into the houseing program they offered. no dice tho...thanks to some people that DONT wanna help the homeless in a shelter they work in. it was really sad that the people that are there to help really dont care what happens to you. after some negotiation i was able to stay a few more days to get the documentation i needed for the housing program but it didnt happen. my work was having problems with payroll so....i had to leave. i had made arrangements with someone from the shelter to stay in a hotel room so we did for a while. the unfortunate part was that it was eating alot of the money i earned every week. i had to actually get a 2nd job.

Section 2 of Life Recorded

It was 9pm when i was dropped off at the Shelter. i entered the place after looking at the people walkign around the outside. I talked with a nice black lady in the office and she said that i would have to come back at 430pm the next day. I was crushed. a night? outside? it was true tho. after i found out what i had to do i left the place and aimlessly walked around near the shelter up and down the streets. i kept contacting my parents not believing that i was really homeless. I just couldnt fathom what was going on with me. I cried for what seemed like forever while lugging around the trash bag and my shoulder bag. walking up and down the streets a few times i finally got tired and found a little trampled path off the hills of one of the roads. i didnt know it at the time but it was fiting that i chose that location because of the church i was actually behind. I sat my bag down and laid on them thinking about how i was betrayed and blah blah blah. Emotional garbage i couldnt digest because i couldnt blame myself for the situtation i was in. I laid there for about an hour trying to fall asleep with no luck. i just laid there and stared up at the sky after a while of trying to sleep still thinking about how i was left alone. i had everything and now i had nothing. i didnt fathom the laptop in one of my bags or the phone that i didnt pay for. i didnt even realize that i had about 400 dollars saved away in case of emergencys. to be truly focused on something so tragic u lose sight of hte things you should be thankful for. its amazing really. My friends wouldnt help me because they either wouldnt or couldnt. so i felt betrayed by them in my hour of need i had no one to fall back on or to even talk to me. After some heated discussions with my parents i finally got the message, You have to learn to take care of yourself, to learn real responsibility. This was the only thing that made me pause from my mutterings and sobbing. i thought about this and started to get angry with them and myself. why didnt i learn this? where had i failed with it? what kept me from doing what i had to to learn what i needed to learn to be able to take care of my self out there in the real world. i had done it before but had been too immature to even then fathom what i had to do for myself. after another hour of angry muttering and sobbing i decided to focus on just getting into the shelter. I started a goal list in my head as i had been taught when i owned my own business. I just now had to waste time and wait for the places around to open. The night dragged on with no food and water since everywhere was closed by this time. i still aimlessly walked around the different street roads just pretty much wasting time and exploring. i finally got thirsty enough to approach an open back door. I asked the people working there if they could spare a cup of water. i tried to make myself as non threatening as possible but with no luck. they told me they couldnt help me cause they didnt actually work for the place i had walked up to. i asked if there was anyone that i could ask inside because i knew they wouldnt just let anyone come in to work on stuff during the night hours without a supervisor for the company. Even then i was turned away like i was trash or going to rob them. now i cant blame them but i was so frusterated and thirsty. I wandered around and sat down at the different bus benches resting before i walked back up or down the street again. at about 2 am the sprinklers for this business went off and at first i just walked past them. Thinking to myself i kept telling myself there was NO way i was going to drink out of those sprinklers. then i finally gave up. Scavenging a cup from the trash i rinsed it out throughly and i mean throughly. I filled the cup up like 3 times to drink from. this wasnt easy after all since the sprinkler shot jets of water and most just sprayed off the sides. the sprinklers stopped abruptly after the 3rd time i filled up the water and i didnt know what i was going to do since i was still thirsty. Wandering around the same paths i stopped at the place behind the church again and just layed there willing myself to go to sleep. i still didnt get any of what was going on and i just laid there trying to sleep. no dice of course. i rose again after a while and headed down to one of the bus stops to sit down again. at about 4 am another set of sprinklers came on and i got another drink. this time filling myself up to the point that i was feeling badly. i continued on til the mcds nearby opened then i sat in there on my laptop for a long time. i just sat there with an orange juice sipping it a bit. i got some breakfast while i was there too and just hung out. a few of the guys came up from the shelter and i learned a bit about how the shelter operates.

end of part 2

A Section of my life Recorded

this is my story of the last 2 months. i expect you to judge me harshly because after i stopped F-ing around in my own head and accepted responsibility for my actions i judged myself prety harshly too. Read or dont i dont care. I just need this to be recorded somewhere for my book ill be writing later. For those of you who read this, plz take to heart that this is the real story how it happened. Learn from it.

leading up to aug 2 when i first became homeless, i wasnt the best person i coulda been. i was lazy, took advantage of what i was given, not appreciative of what i had, and drove someone that coulda taken care of me for the rest of my life if i treated her correctly. this was my first lesson. I paid for everything i lost and lost everything i had. It was God's will that i lost all this. i was in school for classes to study to give myself a better life. How wonderfully sweet of a lie that was to myself. I never considered what God had waiting for me in the future. the day of the 2nd of aug my mother came in and demanded my grades. I calmly walked into the kitchen after i told her i would get them and grabbed a trash bag. I filled the bag with clothes i thought i would need. as many as 5 pairs of clothes...after that i had no idea what i was gonna do. i got ready taking what i needed from the bathroom as well as what i needed from my room. i showed my mother the grades that i had gotten in school. I failed 3 classes. the deal we had for my living arrangement was i worked a job or school and i had to have good grades to keep living. my laziness was finally going to cost me terribly this time. I exited the house and walked down the patio to my car (that didnt work anyways) and just waited....she came out the door and said why? i didnt have an answer for her. i couldnt even formulate an answer to tell her. she asked me what i was gonna do. I told her i had no idea so she went back inside to look for a homeless shelter for me to live at while i figured out what i was gonna do. i waited for her to get the information she wanted to give to me but officially i had already left the house. i got tired of waiting and started to leave the property into the street with my bag of clothes. i hadnt thought of what was gonna happen to me or figured out that this was the result of me blowing continued chances my parents have given me. i walked about a mile from the house towards Hiriam i believe(i live in GA)when i got a call from my mum looking for me. She had found some rescources and a shelter with a number and address to drop me off at. I had no idea what was in store for me when i got to the shelter.

Part 1 end

connecting again

its wonderful connecting with a long lost friend specially when u were crushing on her for a while. everything and every memory comes back to the top of ur mind again but its never the same when u talk to her again. u feel guilty u had to tell her u had to leave. U feel incredibly sad by the parting.

reading and talking with her again has sparked another interest inside of me and revealed feelings i thought i had locked away for ever and ever. connecting with somone is such a strong thing and i feel guilty about what i missed with her. Dont miss your chance connect with somone u lost or had forgotten and ull feel just as happy as i do now.

weird....

some how i pushed another person away from me. i asked her exactly what i did and she told me to quit treating her like a 5 year old.....

sad thing is i have no idea what shes talkin bout... guess some people just dont get my personality or i could be doing things i dont know about unintentionally

this scares me the most since ive been more of a cynical and sarcastic person since my divorce. Things have changed and theyve changed me. i guess i dont click with everyone else anymore and being polite 24/7 just irritates me to no end.

am i really the as*hole people like this say i am or do they just not bother to understand me and my experiences?

My class advertisement.

This is my assignment for my Skills for Success class.

I want to start off by saying this class was very informative for me, even though, I already knew a lot of the things that were covered in each chapter. I would recommend this class to anyone, whether they have the knowledge that I have or whether they are new to this whole college idea. When I first asked my parents why they think that I had to take this class, they told me that they never had the option to take a class like this. Being taught skills to benefit you later in life was definitely a new experience for me. With that being said, I'd like to break down what I learned in each module.

Module 1

I learned a lot about designing a cover letter and resume. I never realized that key words put into the cover letter and resume actually can promote you at a job interview or even catching the employer's attention. This will be a strategy I will utilize in the future when I'm looking for a job. I'd also like to point out how this section also covered making short and long term goals. Revisiting this information was critical for me, since I had only a few goals that I had made since the class started. I, now have, more short term that I'm achieving everyday and have made a few more long term goals that will be within my reach.

Module 2

In this module I learned something I didn't know. Writing an email in a correct, informative, and professional way. This was surprising to me since the format allowed my point to be given and taken in right away. I've actually used this to email my instructor a few times with questions about the assignments. This module also touched on networking and how it can change out lives. I have very specific views on the way technology is making our society lazy but a lot of people in the class allowed me to broaden my views on it and offer great insight to a subject that I had always been one sided on.

Module 3

Another great section for great information. Eating habits is something we all have problems with sometimes and this section offered great information on how to change those habits. I've been able to change my habits after reading this section. I learned how being run down never works and I learned a recipe from one of the other students in my class that sounds yucky but is incredibly good for you. It actually tastes good as well. The item I'm talking about is grilled squash. I tried it two weeks after I got the recipe and I eat it often now.

Module 4

The topic of this section was Time Management. Lemme tell ya, this section helped tons in my life. Managing my time was never something I excelled at. Sure, I got to school on time and got my assignments done, but when I finally started to utilize the strategies in this section, my life got a whole lot more organized and less stressful. I'd recommend this reading to anyone that has a hectic life and has kids, but even someone like me, who has all the time in the world, can use this as well. Before I read this section, I was getting assignments in late because I'd forgotten em, but now I'm doing my assignments early because I set aside time to do assignments and check up on my schoolwork.

Module 5

This was a trying section. Mostly because, a lot of people have had problems with decision making. Decision making is rough to do, because no one is sure of the repercussions of those decisions. This section helped with the decision making process. It has effected the way I make decisions for myself and my future family. I've always tried to offer advice to people who are making decisions I've already made. I've messed up a lot in my life and I wanna make sure those people get the information I never got to make their decision the right one.

Module 6

This module was about job interviewing. This has always been a rough spot for everyone and I'm no exception. I have terrible job interviewing skills but this section helped me understand a lot about it. Our instructor asked us to evaluate what role we fit best as an assignment and I learned that I was the leader type of person. I'm currently preforming this role leading a group of people in an online game. While this doesn't really teach skills for in real life, these people still look for me for guidance in whatever we are doing. I only took this role after I had learned about who I was as a person. I've never been satisfied as a follower and this section just hung a sign over leadership in my head.

Module 7

This section was about note taking skills, improving the way you write down things, and remembering them. I learned a lot of different ways to take notes and the ways to remember them in my head. I learned quite a bit about organizing information and using keywords to trigger my memory for that information. I have a terrible memory and I can't express how much the keyword strategy helped me out with remembering information. I learned a bit about altering my note taking skills to keep the information more organized and a better way to remember the information after I've written it down.

In conclusion, this is an incredible rescource offered to people in this time and day. I went into the class thinking I didn't have to do it because they weren't teaching me anything, but when I stepped back and reevaluted the information that was presented to me, I had actually learned an incredible amount of information. I'd definitly recommend this class to anyone who's going to college. This class will help anyone, even if they think they know it all.

Motivational Posters

http://www.illwillpress.com/MOTIVATE22.html

copy past that and watch plz.....he tells the truth !!!

Imagine my surprise.....

Imagine my surprise....

friend of mine logged in to WC and i had no idea who it was... finally i found out...but they had to do it because they were being stalked by some other people....

seriously? some people just dont take a fraking hint when they are ignored....why cant people be free of this kinda torment? sick basturds.....

im seriously not happy ...cause after i was told the situation it made ME feel like one of them guys....i know since my friend pmed me that im not but u cant help but wonder if it is u....ya know?

school tomorrow

i start school tomorrow...get to ride the train alone and everything >.< shouldnt be too difficult since i pretty much led the expedition last time i went...only difference is that im alone now....

classll be fun but if its sooo polite like they been online ima tell em ive got cancer and excuse myself >.<

"ur so sweet i think u gave me cancer"

Caring.

friend of mine came into my channel in my game. he was annoyed with himself cause he made alotta bad decisions in a game and people were just raging at him. when i asked him why he was taking this kinda crap he told me that they were people he wanted respect from. (this game is mostly people under 18 playing it). he continued to tell me that they were telling him what he should be doing with *this* and when *that* happens how to deal with it...

He cared what a buncha kids had to say about how he played a GAME....a GAME people....WTF are we teaching our kids that they CARE how other kids think of them in a GAME. i continued to talk with him about how these were kids he was looking for respect of and how it wasnt worth being walked on for it. He kept going on about what it meant to him about their oppinions of him. i just about started yelling. who gives a F*** about what people think of them or how they play a game? theres always gonna be people who dont agree with ur play style but its YOURS.

another section of the convo i wanted to point out.
he told me people dont like me cause of the way i play. my next response was "SO? i play how i want to. my stats dont reflect me as a player or how good i am. i am me and this is how i play and F whoever doesnt like it" truely some people think handicapping urself on a game purposely is stupid. i see it as a great training tool to defeating those stronger then u which makes u grow as a person and a player.

i may not care about what people think of me or my style, but some things on this planet really aggravate the F outta me. why should we care what people think of us? we arent the same as everyone else. why should we conform to societys oppinion when clearly we dont fit in Society? people make fun of Emo kids...yes i do it too but i still respect those people for being different and sticking out on purpose. those people are heros to me.

if u can be different then why live ?

another irritating thing im assuming will happen is when my friend will be confronted with whether or not to be my friend because of these "kids" i know he will take me off his list and stop playin games with me. this pisses me off the most cause i respected my friend as a player and a person. now....i dont because of this. i already know it will happen, its just a matter of time.

i apologize if this is long and u probably dont understand anything linked with "the game". but the gist of what i feel and think is there if u take the time to read.