PM me if you are a successful contract killer
Uncle_AAron: You know what they call a quarter pounder with cheese in France? My son and his girlfriend won the costume contest
Uncle_AAron: When you witness an accident on the interstate directly in front of you and the guy gets thrown from his vehicle onto the road
Uncle_AAron: This was my Halloween costume for the contest we're having at work. Companywide. Winner gets a $200 Visa gift card. Second place gets a $100 gift card. Voting lasts for a week, so I won't get my money for awhile
Uncle_AAron: Assuming this little fella can get along with the 2 dogs we already have, I believe we'll be adopting him in about a week
Uncle_AAron: It's hard to believe, but my wife actually STOLE this shot glass from one of those overpriced tourist trap beach shops at Emerald Isle, NC during our summer vacation this year. She likes boobs and sea turtles. But who doesn't, amirite...